I am an Enabler!

Friday I heard on the radio a story of a new York mother who let her 11 year old son ride home on the subway by himself. She got a lot of criticism and some applauding from mothers around the country. When I logged on to check my e-mail tonight her story popped up. When I first heard the story I thought just for a second about the situation. When I read it tonight I realized something. She had said that we are enabling our children. I completely agree with her. No not all parents are like myself, but there are a few. I recently went to a scrap booking crop night and at some point during the night my friend and I got on the subject of our children (isn't that what the subject always is?)..anyway she was telling me about how she had listened to Motivational Parenting c.d. from an LDS mother. It was about what children should be doing at certain ages to be able to gain self-confidence through learning to be independent. As my friend was telling me some of the things that she had heard I thought to myself..."wow, I am failing"...As I have thought about these things and after hearing about the New York mother's experience I have decided I really am enabling my kids. I think about the times I am in such a hurry to get somewhere that I tie their shoes...hence Gillyin will be 6 soon and she doesn't know yet how to tie her own shoes. Or that instead of sticking to my guns when we are in the store and not buying them that 5 dollar toy (that will just end up in the garbage tomorrow)...I end up buying it just so I can get through my shopping list without a fit being thrown. Or even cleaning up after my kids because I have already asked them 100 times to do it and I just can't take it anymore. So instead of having a mess and arguing I decide that I will just do it. What am I teaching my children? AHHHH! I think that so many of us lead such busy lives that it is easier for us to just do it ourselves. But all of a sudden I have realized how horrible that is. I need to make time and schedule my time better so that my children can learn do things themselves. The New York mom had said that her son was so proud that he was able to ride home all by himself on the subway...gaining that self-confidence through being independent. Not that I completely agree with the whole subway story, because that scares me, but the fact that it is soooooo IMPORTANT to instill independence and self-confidence in our children. I have got to get this parenting thing under control. So I guess that will be a goal of mine. Hopefully through a lot of prayer I can do it. From letting them dress them self to making sure that they know how to make a PB and J. It is time I let them start being more independent...I know everyone will benefit from it, right?

Motherhood

As a mother of 3 young children I often wonder if I am doing my job. And as a hair dresser I have many mothers that sit in my chair. Some are mothers of children that are now grown and moved away and now they are grandmothers. Some are mothers of teenagers, dealing with high school, all their childrens activities and preparing for the future. Some are mothers of children that are all now in grade school. Relieved to have some time to themslef, but wondering now what they will do with their time. And some mothers are where I am right now in my journey. Wondering how in the world I will make it through one more day of cleaning up spills, sweeping up crumbs, trying to get the ketchup out of the carpet, hearing..."mom come wipe my bum". How many times will I have to say..."please stop fighting!", "idiot is not a nice word!", and "please put your shoes on when you go outside. you have holes in every one of your socks!". Sometimes I think...will this laundry ever be done?...why do I even mop the kitchen floor?...and...why our bathroom becomes a water park at bath time. Most of the time I pray that...I will be bathed and ready before my boys wake up...that I will beable to find a pair of matching shoes...and that the word MOM will not get over used!..It is a differnt journey every day. Always something new. When I wake up in the morning I hope for patience, understanding and unconditional love. All 3 of my children are so oppisite from eachother and I have learned that what works for one does not work for the others. Recently my 4 year old, Heston, decided to knock 2 panels out of his friends families wood fence. The mother sent him home to tell me what he had done. I greatly appreciated this mothers wisdom. I later called and told her sorry, asked her if I needed to come fix her fence, and told her to let me know if he ever was out of line when at her home. My son ventured to her home again later that day. Not long after I got a phone call. Informing me that she had more bad news...Heston and some boys had been throwing rocks in her window well and Heston had thrown one and it shattered her basement window. I felt horrible. Twice in one day my child had been destructive and at someone elses home. I walked a crying 4 year old to her door and in an extremely sad vioce he looked up at her and said..."I am bery sorry". Then I looked at her and she had tears in her eyes aswell. She said to me earlier in the day..."it takes a village to raise a child"...ISN’T THAT THE TRUTH. Her love for my son was obvious. I apologized again, told her we would take care of the window and we walked home. I have been thinking about her and the example she has been to me. How great it is to live in the community that I do and be surrrounded by such loving people. I guess as I am journying through this thing called motherhood I am definately not alone!

Gillyin...dance recital

Heston...Dance Recital

County Cinderella Pageant 2008

Last saturday was the county Cinderella Pageant! Gillyin did so good. She placed second alternate over-all...out of 23 girls! She loves being on stage! Grandma Sheila, Uncle Russ, Aunt Kami, Pageant Coach (Aunt Jessica), Aunt Joanna and Uncle Shawn were all there to cheer her on! Thank You all for being there!

Hello!!!

Hello! So I guess we are going to try this out! It will give us a chance to share our crazy every day lives with those we love! I hope we can entertain, inspire and put a smile on your face! Here it goes...